The Beauty of God’s Love Seen Through Foster Care
In August of 2020, when the world was still attempting to stabilize from lockdown and schools were restarting in a new normal, our family welcomed two young boys through our front door. In the months prior, my wife and I had filled out all the foster care paperwork, did our CPR and first aid training, sent in our background checks and were waiting for that phone call that will instantly change your life. Finally, we had received that phone call and the work of turning our home into a place suitable for a three-month-old and 1 year old. And so, we did what most would, and Amazon was our best friend.
Months have turned into a year, and we still are fostering but now they are a 1 and 2 year old. In the background of a noisy and chaotic house is the definite reality that this time together might not be forever. Our current family of 6, might soon be a family of 4 again. These holidays spent with our foster kids might be our last, but it might not be. Our phone camera roll is a reminder that these two are not just occupants of our house but are a part of our family.
A thought that we have had to wrestle through and have been asked in a variety of ways is “how do you love knowing that it might only be temporary?” or “will it be hard when they go back?”.
The reality is that in a perfect world, foster care would not be necessary. In a broken world, like we live in, fostering is a necessary and difficult experience. You are asked to love but also prepared that this is most likely a temporary solution. Our foster care experience has helped us wrestle with the beauty of God’s love for us.
- God loves my kids more than I do.
In the last blog I wrote, this truth has gripped me. It was true when the thought first stuck with me and is true today as well. I love my kids imperfectly but God loves them perfectly. While I do not know the future, I do have a God that I can entrust them to.
- God’s love for me cost His Son.
At the beginning I asked, “How do you love knowing that you will most likely be hurt?”. Isn’t this exactly what the gospel is? God loved me despite of me. Tim Keller says it this way, “The gospel is this: We are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope.”. Love always comes at a cost. John 3:16, probably the most known Bible verse says that God’s love for us meant giving His Son. Often, I want love to cost nothing or not cause any pain. God shows us His love and it came at an infinite cost, his Son (Romans 5:8).
- My love for others is a mirror of God’s love for me.
This is difficult! People are complex and there are complexities that do not make this simple. Truth be told, we have found fostering two young kids very challenging and extremely stretching. Often, they are more of a mirror revealing our own heart. Through foster care, we have had an enlarged picture of our human depravity but also of God’s love for us. God loves me on my really good days and God loves me on my really poor days. His love for me does not change. Jesus died knowing that I am still a work in progress. His love is not fickle. I am reminded of what Paul says in I Corinthians 13 which is perfectly displayed in Jesus. “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”
And so today, I choose to entrust my kids to the hands of a loving Father who loves them far more than I ever could. I pray that my love for them would grow and would mirror God’s love for me.